Psychotherapy/Counselling
"Which psychotherapy or counselling is best for me?"
The answer is like this: If you have five psychologists
in a room, then you have at least six different opinions on which is
the best way to help people.
The fact of the matter is, that all
psychotherapies or counselling are
equally effective given two important factors. Firstly, at the end of
the first or second session, you should leave with a clear understanding of the
therapeutic/counselling process and how it will work. Secondly, your
understanding
of the process should leave you with confidence that this psychologist
can and will help you.
So,
from the first or second session you should have confidence and clarity about what the psychologist is about to
take you through. You should have it in writing. You should have
handouts that clearly represent what the psychologist told you in your
session. You should have a clear idea of the estimated number of
sessions that are required to help you effectively.
The aim of any system of Psychotherapy or Counselling is to
reduce symptoms and to remove obstacles to progress in life, not to
change your personality. The process, in most cases
need only take around 8 to 16 weekly one-hour sessions, with homework
completed in between sessions.
Psychotherapy literally means ?treatment for the mind?. Rather than a drug, the
treatment is the process of taking-on effective strategies and skills to manage
life's challenges more effectively and to remove any obstacles to your progress
in life.
The days of endlessly analysing your childhood or
sitting around merely complaining to a paid listener are long gone.
Expect to be an active participant in the therapeutic processes. There
will be homework.
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Insight sometimes comes to us as a fleeting glimpse. For
example, you notice that you are repeating similar patterns in
your current relationship and/or repeating similar patterns across
different and/or past relationships.
These patterns can be difficult to see clearly when you
are in the middle of them, and often awareness comes when
reflecting back in
time over your current relationship, or reflecting back on past
relationships.
People frequently seek help from a psychologist
when they suspect that they are in the process of
repeating old patterns in their current relationship, or after
a relationship ends, and they would like to learn from their
experiences and create healthier interactions in relationships to come.
These recurrent patterns or themes in
relationships typically happen outside your awareness, often unfolding
relatively subtly and gradually. This can make it difficult to detect
your own contributions to your patterns, to understand underlying
causes, and to work out how to change.
Often, one or both partners is looking for a
quick-fix. Dr Lloyd says that this is unrealistic and ultimately
damaging. Couples who are looking for a quick-fix usually end up going
from one psychologist to another, or just giving up,
without ever gaining satisfaction.
Dr Lloyd recommends that the sessions begin with
both partners attending the first session
together. Then each
partner needs to attend individuals sessions. Quite likely, each
individual will need to attend four to eight sessions each. Once the individual
sessions are complete, regardless of how many are required, then both
partners should attend joint sessions as required.
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